Trump Voters — Still Happy Campers

We asked a sample of the President’s supporters “Just tell us why?”

 Despite his consistently record low approval rating in general, not to mention a lot of eye rolling and cries of WTF internationally, President Trump remains solidly popular with his base of 35% of Americans.

 To discover why they’re so pleased while the rest of the world is hoping that it’s all a bad dream, we canvased a cross section of Trump supporters to see what the hell is going on with these people:

 Jed Clampett  — Hill Billy Oil Tycoon
Oooo doggie! Be right pleased with this Trump fella— especially the nice things he says about the oil business Since I have an oil well, I cotton to the way he’s all over those EPA regulations like a granny on a piece of road kill. I’m even thinkin’ ‘bout buying me a coal mine.”

American Gothic Couple — Average Red Blooded Americans
Me and the misses are quite pleased. After eight years of Obama, the White House is “White” again. We showed those condescending multicultural East/West coast elitist by electing a billionaire real estate developer who is as dumb as we are.”

Uncle Pennybags — Rich Guy from Monopoly
“TAX CUTS, TAX CUTS, TAX CUTS!!! Especially impressed with how he’s making life hard for poor people. If you can be poor and happy, where’s the fun in being rich?”

Reverend Billy Bob Gramcracker—Evangelical Bible Thumper
“Praise the Lord. Let he who has not grabbeth pussy cast the first…whatever. The War on Christmas is over, and we once again freely wish each other Merry Christmas as we get back to what this joyous holy day is all about — shopping for incredible bargains. Next, can we cut Chanukah back from 8 days to 2?”

Cletius—Southern Man
“The South has risen again. Finally, a President who’ll hold up the grand tradition of rebelling against the Federal Go’mnt. Gonna party like it’s 1859! Should have let us go when they had the chance.”

Herman Goring — Deceased Nazi Icon, Epitome of Evil
“Javohl, just like da good ol’ days!”

Vladamir Putin, Ex KGB Agent, Social Media Marketing Guru
KPI?  ROI? LOL-ski